.

its just that nostalgia and wondering if ive left too much behind
its the craving and the yearning that i feel too guilty to act upon
its the emotions that are torn between two times and minds
the choking breath of confusing and the tension of carrying the ting
to run away from everythuing that needs to be adressed
the tight strings slowly snaping , pulling tearing
shouting voices and troubled tones
the first time i saw an orange sunset over blue waters i closed my eyes
danger in the most pure moments.
hypocrasy abused from an elevated vantage point
fear and insecurity
but with a dash of someone else to think about
you spend years dreamign of someone to stick with you, to guide your through the things you cant work out for yourself. the times when you dont knwo why or what or how.
then you feel guilty for what it could do to someone and you sink back to the solitude
strick up the past fuckign addictions but make it more invisible than ever. so much more discreat, but you learn that making things known leaves you onto a muddy track with rotten leaves lacking the lustre of the autumn colours, pugent mouldy berries loosing their sweet taste, the smell of decaying animals lambs that never grew up, the sound of children crying lost in the forset. you fall deeper. it makes you think. will it ever be reverse.
so lets mix it up a little. numbing the sense cooling and tingling, numb the soul. blur your vision with such an incipid liquid makes you shudder as it burns, blur your soul.