nothings changed...well not really, not deep down, not to the people who matter, the people who matter havent. what matters hasnt.
i miss the things that i never appriciated, the people i never told i cared about.
i miss sleepless nights and i love sleeping in clothes...dont ask why
i miss manchester, and how i feel on overly large planes where you can feel alone at that height above spread out citys and dazzling lights.
i might have said that before.i hate manchester now, and airports make me feel alone.
i miss how i've got a dark alley made me cry and lying is the most fun. i need to feel that again.
i want to visit too many places, but i havent seen enough in my hometown.i miss darkness with streetlights invading it, and the heavy feeling of rain running on me and splashing down onto the ground.
i miss new friends and i hate meeting new people.
i miss watching big brother and drinking coffee like a middle aged women
i'm already missing the student pantry=]

now i'm sat alone in my darkened room with the only light coming from my computer screen and my ipod in the speakers playing music from my computer, and those veyr same streetlights i see every night im in my room. i do lvoie to stare at.
i miss so much. of how things used to be i really do. theres one eprson who could remind me but. but its not ghoing to happen everyones changed on the outside at least. i miss the old obsessions and feelings and security. i hate the way things are now. i can only escape it with a few minutes. things have gone from laughing on the kitchen floor to sitting in a silence with so much tension its unbearable. from making an attempt and testing boundaries to running away from the underlying problems and the river of confusion that is running to fast masking everything that is the truth in the relaitonships. just give me one fucking weekend. or one fucking night. to relive it. thats all i need
fucking realise please.

ifuckingmissthis
xo
fuckyou. no really